once upon a time i was a goth girl, though back in the day they called it deathrock. i never grew out of my love of the music, or for that matter a prediliction for black clothes, red lips, boots and kohl eyeliner. suppose you can take the girl out of the goth(scene), but you can't take the goth out of the girl.
i remember there was this boy who used to dance at helter skelter, right in the middle of the floor. he would not move the bottom half of his body at all, just twist and twirl and turn all in arms and shoulders, his eyes half-lidded and fluttering. the original version of this song was one he was always out there for. in all the time we went there i do not think we ever spoke, or that i even knew his name. but he was a fixture, a given, something we would come to expect to see. i cannot hear this song without seeing him there, dancing.
we look hard
we look through
we look hard to see for real
such things i hear, they don't make sense
i don't see much evidence
i don't feel. i don't feel. i don't feel
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